• staying home
    narcissistic abuse,  PTSD,  regret

    The Cost of Staying: Narcissistic Abuse

      The devastating cost of being in a narcissistic relationship is often brushed over as if once a person leaves such a relationship, the price is paid. Nothing could be further from the truth. An abusive marriage is a bit like a predatory loan. You will keep paying interest long after the price of the loan is paid. I wish more material existed twenty-five years ago when I debated about divorcing. I didn’t realize then that, in one sense, I was already too late. I could escape in body, but true freedom would come much later. So I thought I would put together a list of what staying with a…

  • hope
    Devotional

    Knowing Shalom: Restoring Hope

    Knowing Shalom: Restoring Hope I learned something about hope today from a coworker. He talked about a behavioral experiment on rats. First, scientists placed rats in a bucket of water to see how long they would swim. Generally, they would swim for about 15 minutes before giving up. Then the scientists added another layer to the experiment. They pulled the rats out of the water after several minutes and dried them off. Then they put the poor rats back in the bucket. This time they could swim for 60 hours. The difference? Hope. The rats could last much longer if they knew that survival and rescue were an option. It is…

  • Devotional

    Knowing Shalom: Moving in Wholeness

    Wholeness seems elusive to those who have experienced trauma. And truthfully, many of us define ourselves by what we lack, whether education, health, money, or any number of desirables. Worse, trauma or abuse leave us feeling robbed of our innocence, a sense of well-being, or perhaps our homes and families. But the shalom of the Lord includes a sense of wholeness.  When the King of the universe dwells within us, he fills our spirits. Accessing his presence within ourselves is the absolute key to healing and restoration. He gives us so many ways to access him, though we don’t always recognize them. From reading the Bible to sitting under the…