Controlling Behaviors
- abuse, abuser, Conflict, Contempt, Controlling Behaviors, Narcissism, narcissist, narcissistic abuse, narcissistic kids, narcissists, Sociopath
How to Grey Rock Your Way Out of Toxic Relationships
The most interesting thing about a grey rock is how utterly lacking in interest it is. Think of all the grey rocks you have walked past without even noticing. Turns out no one is interested in them except the occasional geologist. For the person attempting to avoid a run-in with a manipulator or anyone trying to lose the attention of a narcissist, it is inspirational. Narcissists cannot stand it when they don’t get the attention they feel they deserve. And if their victims consistently put in practice these few suggestions, they may just succeed in losing the patronage of the predator. After all, you can’t get blood from a stone,…
-
Despair: The Aim of the Abuser
Despair is not often discussed, though it is considered a dangerous psychological condition. Psychology Today describes despair as: … profound and existential hopelessness, helplessness, powerlessness, and pessimism about life and the future. Despair is a deep discouragement and loss of faith about one’s ability to find meaning, fulfillment, and happiness, to create a satisfactory future for oneself. The goal of an abuser is to produce the elements of despair in another person. In speaking with the victims of this abuse and having suffered as one myself, I am always surprised at how difficult it is to admit to the intentionality of emotional abuse. Victims often invent excuses for their…
-
Your Abusive Spouse: When to Leave
Leave your abusive spouse now. Before anyone protests the sanctity of the marriage vow, let me say that I don’t take this answer lightly. And let me qualify the term, abusive spouse. Most people are occasionally emotionally ‘abusive’. These days that term is loosely bandied about and it can be difficult to ferret out what one or another individual means by it. Ironically, many abusers accuse their spouses of abusive behavior in an attempt to deflect their own wrongdoing. So let’s be clear by what this term really entails. Many people shut down, withdraw, lose their temper, and sulk. As humans, we are sometimes passive-aggressive, over-step a boundary, or let…
