relationship
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Fostering Kittens and Healing from Trauma
Fostering feral kittens requires some patience and Gerber baby food chicken. I started the fostering process with a local non-profit. The big reward is to see the wild babies slowly decide to become domesticated, learning to trust humans for the first time. I find their progression fascinating, especially given that cats individually decide to become tame. Dogs want to be tamed, but according to the feral kitten experts, cats determine their fates for themselves. I’m less of a foster parent than a sales rep for the human race. Some kittens are an easier sell than others. The younger, the better of course, but helping them heal from their unexpected capture,…
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Six Toxic Responses to Boundaries
Toxic people dislike boundaries the way my cats hate a closed door. They figure it is their right to come and go as they please. The ripped up carpet and scratches on my door attest to their utter determination to have their way. The cats, that is. Toxic people usually damage far more than just a rug and a couple of doors. I suppose learning how to erect healthy boundaries always includes a learning curve. I, for one, did not anticipate the ruthlessness and perseverance with which toxic people attempt to discredit, tear down, and generally disrespect boundaries. But I have learned to spot the usual toxic strategies. I can’t…
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How to Model Emotional Intimacy for Your Children
Emotional intimacy is a term usually reserved for couples. In reality, emotional intimacy is a skill that we learn by observing our parents and by practicing with close friends as we mature. Many parents are careful to withhold any conflicts or even affection from each other in front of their kids. I suppose the reasoning is that somehow children should be insulated from the adult world, free from its worries and problems. To some extent, I agree. After all, children should not be asked to carry the heavy baggage of adulthood. The baggage of childhood is heavy enough. I never understood why we romanticize childhood. It has its own agonies.…
