Trauma
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Gaslighting 101: Eight Signs You’re a Victim
Gaslighting was a way of life for me while I was married to my narcissistic ex-husband. I just didn’t know it. Later, as I became aware of the various techniques of gaslighting, I realized that I had been a gullible victim of this technique. Perhaps I shouldn’t say gullible. The truth is that many victims of narcissistic abuse don’t discern what is happening because their own hearts are not evil. People have a tendency to perceive reality through the lens of their own motivations. If their motivations are pure, it rarely occurs them that others have wicked intent. I frequently get emails from victims of narcissistic abuse. Often, I try…
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How Abuse Damages Your Faith
The damages of abuse are well-documented and include PTSD, mood disorders, physical illnesses, and a host of relational difficulties. Less discussed are the damages an abusive relationship can inflict on a victim’s relationship with God. Often a good deal of spiritual abuse accompanies any other type of mistreatment and can really hamper a person’s belief in and relationship with God. Because our relationship with God serves as a basis for both deliverance from the abuser as well as healing from abuse, the enemy often targets a victim’s faith. For most of us, our experiential belief trumps the intellectual assent of our religious beliefs. What this means is that our experiences…
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Eight Signs You Need Counseling
Just the word, counseling, often has a negative effect on people, I have noticed. If you want to cause a defensive reaction in someone, suggest gently and without any judgment, they would benefit from counseling. Immediately they hear only something is wrong with me. Then wait for the litany of various reasons why counseling will not work or has not worked in the past. Counseling is too expensive, time-consuming, and doesn’t help them. They know someone who went to counseling and boy, did that counselor mess them up. I have even heard the excuse that God, as our Wonderful Counselor, did not endorse other counseling, despite the many verses in…
