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How to Overcome Learned Helplessness
The typical picture given of learned helplessness is of a hawk staying in its cage, though the door is open and it is free to soar once again. The problem with this image is that, while certainly poignant, it minimizes the actual damage that precedes the state of learned helplessness. Abuse is almost always the precursor to a person deciding that they cannot escape their situations. A feeling of powerlessness is a direct result of suffering mistreatment and contributes greatly to depression. The condition can progress to the point where a person will give up trying to escape the painful situation and instead, simply resign themselves to their apparently inevitable…
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False Refuges: Learning to Trust Yourself after Abuse
I learned to escape into false refuges early on into my first marriage. My first marriage taught me that I couldn’t trust God. After all, I prayed for my ex-husband extensively and nothing ever happened. He must be one of the most prayed for humans on the planet since my mother spent a lot of her prayer time having a go at him as well. Because my prayers didn’t work and God did not change my ex from a narcissistic abuser into a good guy, I lost my trust in a God who changed people. I didn’t pray for people for a long time. I didn’t think it would do…
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The Intense Vulnerability of God
For most people, vulnerability is not the first word that comes to their mind when they think about God. Usually, people go one of two directions: theological or personal. The theologically minded say words like omnipotent and omniscient. Those who take a more personal route to God say words like loving, good, and grace. But for me, as I move in a direction ever closer to Him, I am regularly astonished by His vulnerability. Genesis leads with God crafting a world and then humans made in His image to live in it. Not as dolls in an elaborate dollhouse or puppets to be manipulated on a stage. He makes humans,…
Healing Through Art & Words
