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Can Narcissists Change? The Answer is Complicated
Everybody wants narcissists to change, except the narcissists themselves, generally. Like most mental illnesses, narcissism exists on a spectrum. We all have some narcissistic traits which we either grow out of or perhaps use to our benefit. I think most writers have something of an ego. After all, we think we have things to write which we think others ought to read. And nothing feels better than a complimentary reader. The real trick is determining if the narcissist in your life has a personality disorder or if he or she is merely immature and self-absorbed. And often, the spouses have front row seats to the show and have to determine…
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Five Signs of a Vulnerable Narcissist
The vulnerable narcissist can be difficult to detect. Like a covert narcissist or one who hides his or her tendencies behind a façade of good behavior while undermining others, the vulnerable narcissist has his or her own façade. As the name suggests, the vulnerable narcissist hides behind a façade of weakness. The other two types are easier to detect. After all, a grandiose narcissist is always tooting his own horn and a malignant one has a mean streak a mile wide. My first run-in with a vulnerable narcissist was actually a literary one. C.S. Lewis describes one in his book, The Screwtape Letters, very effectively as the mother of the…
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Five Signs of a Covert Narcissist: Judas Iscariot
The marks of a covert narcissist are not very different from those of most narcs. They all wish to appear as important and particularly righteous or better than others. The main difference is that a covert narcissist lacks the aggression and the overt behaviors of most narcs. Generally passive-aggressive, the covert narcissist often plays the victim while quietly undermining others. The covert narcissist does in secret what most other narcissists do in the open. But the signs of any narcissist remain the same. Here is a short list: A personal sense of grandiosity A fantasy life that revolves around being influential, famous, and/or important A frequent exaggeration of their intelligence…
Healing Through Art & Words
