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How to Tell if You Are in a Cocoon Phase
We Christians often like to talk about transformation, but the cocoon phase of that process is less glamorous. The Bible spills over with stories about men and women in cocoons of one sort or another. The message each time is the same. Some metamorphosis happens fast, but more often than not, change takes some time. The growth required to move from caterpillar to butterfly fascinates me. I remember as a child finding an exotic caterpillar in my backyard. I put it in a small plastic container with food and a stick. Soon a greyish sack, smooth on one side and puckered on the other, hung from the twig I had…
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How to Overcome Learned Helplessness
The typical picture given of learned helplessness is of a hawk staying in its cage, though the door is open and it is free to soar once again. The problem with this image is that, while certainly poignant, it minimizes the actual damage that precedes the state of learned helplessness. Abuse is almost always the precursor to a person deciding that they cannot escape their situations. A feeling of powerlessness is a direct result of suffering mistreatment and contributes greatly to depression. The condition can progress to the point where a person will give up trying to escape the painful situation and instead, simply resign themselves to their apparently inevitable…
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False Refuges: Learning to Trust Yourself after Abuse
I learned to escape into false refuges early on into my first marriage. My first marriage taught me that I couldn’t trust God. After all, I prayed for my ex-husband extensively and nothing ever happened. He must be one of the most prayed for humans on the planet since my mother spent a lot of her prayer time having a go at him as well. Because my prayers didn’t work and God did not change my ex from a narcissistic abuser into a good guy, I lost my trust in a God who changed people. I didn’t pray for people for a long time. I didn’t think it would do…
Healing Through Art & Words
