Boundary Lines
-
Six Toxic Responses to Boundaries
Toxic people dislike boundaries the way my cats hate a closed door. They figure it is their right to come and go as they please. The ripped up carpet and scratches on my door attest to their utter determination to have their way. The cats, that is. Toxic people usually damage far more than just a rug and a couple of doors. I suppose learning how to erect healthy boundaries always includes a learning curve. I, for one, did not anticipate the ruthlessness and perseverance with which toxic people attempt to discredit, tear down, and generally disrespect boundaries. But I have learned to spot the usual toxic strategies. I can’t…
- Boundaries, Boundary Lines, Burden-bearing, codependency, Discernment, emotional health, Identity, Redemptive Gifts
The Empath Survival Kit: Loving Constructively
Empath is a relatively new term to enter our vernacular. The dictionary defines empath as (chiefly in science fiction) a person with the paranormal ability to apprehend the mental or emotional state of another individual. Signs of an Empath The term has come to mean those people with the spiritual gift of burden-bearing, at least in a Christian context. Are you a burden-bearer? Those of us with this gift can sense the suffering of others and are often motivated to sit with them in their slough of despair. Please note that I am not talking about empaths as intuitives. I am discussing this, not from a New Age perspective but from…
-
Boundary Lines: The Truth about Personal Balance
The boundary lines in our lives are often indistinct because we err in one of two ways in calculating what belongs inside them and what does not. Scott Peck, in his classic work, The Road Less Travelled, divides these people into those he calls neurotics and those who have a serious character flaw. (By the way, this is a must-read) The first take the blame for everything while the latter takes the blame for nothing. While some of us fall clearly within one of these two categories, most of us straddle the fence between assuming responsibility for everything and refusing culpability for anything. If we take a close look at…
