narcissistic abuse
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The Christian Narcissist: Tares among the Wheat
Just the term, Christian narcissist, should be an oxymoron. Someone once told me that the difference between a tare or a weed and a shaft of wheat is impossible to tell until harvest. When wheat is ready to be reaped, its head, heavy with kernels, droops down as if in prayer. Tares always maintain a rigid upright position. So the metaphor holds firm. In humans, the difference between a Christian and a narcissist is the difference between humility and pride. Since I started my blog a little over two years ago, over one hundred women have contacted me about their husbands who, more often than not, are pastors. Usually, they…
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Trusting Yourself Again After Narcissistic Abuse
Trusting yourself to make good decisions when recovering from trauma related to abuse is a journey that takes a bit of time. I often hear from men and women who find themselves doubting themselves, unable to take risks in relationships and generally stuck in self-imposed isolation. Trusting one’s self after being trapped in an abusive relationship takes some intentionality and a bit of wisdom. Additionally, many of us receive a message from the church which further separates us from ourselves. If the world, the flesh, and the devil are our worst enemies, then we learn to shun the first, ignore the middle one (our flesh) and flee the last. But…
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The Unreasonable Nabal: Narcissists in the Bible
Now the name of the man was Nabal, and the name of his wife Abigail: and she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance: but the man was churlish and evil in his doings, and he was of the house of Caleb. 1 Samuel 25: I suppose everyone has moments where they are unreasonable. I know I do. But most people come around once they get a nap, a snack, or a good talking to. But for others, being unreasonable is a tool that they use to upend other’s sense of reality. The narcissist is the inventor of the impossible choice, I think, and Nabal is a perfect example. The title of this post came…
