What Your Prayers Say about You


My prayers are probably like most people’s. They center around my family and my community. Many of my prayers are just listening prayers, spending time with the Holy Spirit in order to discern His will. So I was a little surprised when God told me that He wanted to revise some of the prayers on my list. I keep a list of requests on my phone. I like to be able to review them, and when one gets answered, it moves to my praise report list.

But God had never told me to actually reword my prayer list before. I suppose I should preface this by admitting I am reading a couple books by Dawna De Silva on shifting atmospheres. They challenge me to be aware of my spiritual surroundings. But in Atmospheres 101, De Silva references aprayers revelation her husband recently had on the three seats of prayer.

Now I am aware that my prayers need to be in accordance with God’s will and with scripture. I am not calling down fire on my enemies (though that is a Biblical prayer). Nor am I trying to manipulate the people in my life by confessing their sins for them and issuing God instructions on how He should change them. Though I will admit that I have been guilty of that in the past.

As far as I knew, my prayers represented the burdens on my heart for my children, husband, and community. Please keep my daughters safe. Please grant my husband favor. I bet most women pray those things for their kids and mates. And I wholeheartedly believe that God wants my daughters safe and my husband to walk in His favor.

The Seat of Fear

The issue is not one of whether my prayers were God’s will. The three seats of prayer are about the motivations of our hearts. The first seat is the seat of fear. Do we live in fear of a fallen world, where battles are sometimes lost, even if the war is won? Experience quickly teaches us that bees sting, bullies are mean, and we make mistakes. And as we watch our children shoulder the burden of their lives, we fear for them.

I’m afraid my girls will be unhappy in love. I am afraid they will fall prey to wicked men. And my heart cringes at the idea that they will miss their callings on their lives. That they will not discover who they are in Christ. And so my prayers for them come from the seat of fear. But perfect love casts out all fear. What does that even mean?

It means that I can trust the Father God is active in the lives of my children. He cares for them and my prayers need to come into alignment with His will for their lives. After all, I have been unhappy in love. I fell prey to a wicked man. And the God, in His loving mercy, rescued me when I called out to Him in my distress. Will He not do the same for my children?

My plea, Keep them safe! is now changed to Let them grow in wisdom and stature, learning to discern between good and evil. Let Your will in heaven be manifested in their lives on earth. Now, I want to note God wasn’t being critical of the cries of a mother’s heart. His purpose in helping revise my prayer was to empower the cries of a mother’s heart into a prayer that moves mountains and causes atmospheres to rumble. I don’t pray from a spirit of love but of power!

The Seat of Selfish Ambition

I have never been particularly competitive. Except maybe when it comes to Words with Friends. Then I am a shark. But I don’t tend to ask for a big house or a fancy car. I have asked for jobs before but not out of a desire to be promoted but to actually just feed my family. In fact, the whole blogging thing is great except for the fact that I have to promote myself. By the way, thanks for the reads. I am deeply grateful.

But when it comes to my husband, it is a different matter. You see, I often pray for his success. And my idea of success isn’t kingdom success where he prayersleads his whole office to the Lord. I have hounded heaven to make his bosses see what a jewel he is. And in doing so, I have cared more for the favor of men than the favor of God. And also, having a successful husband is kind of cool.

But again, this is not the kind of prayer I am called to pray. How easy it is to seek the kingdom of man when it is the kingdom of God to which we (and our husbands) are called. How do I pray now? Let Spencer fulfill his full destiny in Christ. Let him walk in God’s favor, wherever that might lead him. Bless the work of his hands, yes. But also help him to surrender all he is and has to God, seeking God’s kingdom first.

The Seat of Love

The seat of love is the throne of God. He is love. To pray from a place of love is to pray Him into situations. Real prayer is an invitation. Show me who You are. Show me what You are doing. What would Love do in this situation? Fill this community with the presence of God which is Love. The seat of love is where the power is.

When I learned that I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father, my prayers changed from desperate supplications to confident requests. The upgrade was in the recognition of my adoption papers into the family of God. But understanding the three seats of prayer was another upgrade. Now I have another litmus test through which I test the spirit behind my prayers.

Am I at rest in Him? Or am I anxious about all the things the world presents as being scary? I will admit that rewording my prayer list really was a faith boost. I felt more in line with what the Father is doing. After all, He is moving in my children’s lives. Abba cares about my husband and wants to partner with him in his workplace. Knowing that one is in absolute alignment with God’s will is the biggest faith injection one could have, even in a simple prayer list on a cell phone.

The Power of Delight


10 Replies to “What Your Prayers Say about You”

  1. “Confident requests”. I like that. Knowing when I pray, I am confidently praying and knowing God is hearing my prayers. 🙂

  2. Heather Hart says: Reply

    Jesus’ prayer in the garden of Gethsemane is one that always sticks with me. “Not my will but yours be done.” Anytime I catch myself praying selfishly I have to add that and God always points me in a different direction. Because it’s not about safety and happiness, it’s about knowing God and trusting His will.

  3. Emily Saxe | To Unearth says: Reply

    Love these thoughts, Alice! It’s so important to remember that God wants our prayers to reflect His will, not our selfish desires.

  4. Donna Miller says: Reply

    I need to pray more for my daughters to have wisdom! I was always afraid they would fall prey to evil men too or not realize their identity in Christ! I never thought of how we pray from the seat of fear. TY for this very deep and thought provoking post! ❤

  5. “When I learned that I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father, my prayers changed from desperate supplications to confident requests.” I love that!

  6. First, I love that you move your answered prayers to a “praise report list”! I use a prayer journal every morning so that I can go back and reread my prayers from a few days, weeks or months ago. To see how God has moved in my life but also to check myself. To see if I am praying for His will and my discernment of His will or am I praying from a place of fear or selfishness. Such a great post, Alice!

  7. God has put prayer on my heart lately. I haven’t been doing a good job. This post was a needed read at the right time:)

  8. LOVE this post, and have shared it. God has taught me these same lessons 🙂
    I pray Scripture, as God is watching over His Word, faithfully to perform it, and His Word never returns to Him void, but accomplishes the purpose for which is was sent forth.
    I went right through the N.Test., copying out all the prayers.
    Sharing just 4 here to show you what I mean:
    Ephesians 1.2 T.P.T. May God himself, the heavenly Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
    release grace over you and impart total well-being into your lives.

    3 John 1 2 Beloved friend, I pray that you are prospering in every way and that you continually enjoy good health, just as your soul is prospering.

    Colossians 1 11 We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father.

    “Now may the God of peace make you holy in every way, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless until our Lord Jesus Christ comes again. God will make this happen, for he who calls you is faithful.” (1 Thessalonians 5:23-24, NLT)

    Ps 90.17: May the favour[a] of the Lord our God rest on us;
    establish the work of our hands for us—
    yes, establish the work of our hands.

    God Bless you Alice.
    Your writing is such a blessing to me and several friends.

  9. I write my prayers on my prayer wall and there was a time where I felt God wanted me to take a lot of them down and rewrite them. The wording I changed to changed the way I prayed for things which ultimately changed my heart.

  10. But that’s such a big issue – that we really don’t accept how much we are God’s child and how much He loves us!

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