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How the Church Promotes Abuse (without meaning to)
I dislike writing any criticism about the church. She is the Bride of Christ and as such, is holy and set apart. And these days, the criticism of Christians by other Christians is often abusive, condemning, and ugly. This particular issue, however, weighs on my heart and mind. I bring it up humbly, qualifying my topic with the knowledge that not all churches or Christians, by any means, have this problem. I minister to many women, and actually, quite a number of men. Each of them finds themselves mired in abusive marriages with unrepentant spouses. In some cases, the spouses regularly attend church and spout Bible verses all the time.…
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Depersonalization: Living Apart from Ourselves
Depersonalization and derealization according to the definition that pops up in my Google feed: …involves a persistent or recurring feeling of being detached from one’s body or mental processes, like an outside observer of one’s life (depersonalization), and/or a feeling of being detached from one’s surroundings (derealization). Most people have episodes of depersonalization that occur sporadically throughout their lives. It is only when these are prolonged and begin to interfere with every day functioning that the professionals get involved. My observations on this topic are personal and not professional, though I have helped quite a few people identify and move through this phenomenon in ministry. The experts tell us that…
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Despair: The Aim of the Abuser
Despair is not often discussed, though it is considered a dangerous psychological condition. Psychology Today describes despair as: … profound and existential hopelessness, helplessness, powerlessness, and pessimism about life and the future. Despair is a deep discouragement and loss of faith about one’s ability to find meaning, fulfillment, and happiness, to create a satisfactory future for oneself. The goal of an abuser is to produce the elements of despair in another person. In speaking with the victims of this abuse and having suffered as one myself, I am always surprised at how difficult it is to admit to the intentionality of emotional abuse. Victims often invent excuses for their…
Healing Through Art & Words
